Do you believe that circumstances occur for a reason and no matter what happens or how bad it may seem, that you are exactly where you are supposed to be? Or do you look on situations as either good or bad and cry “woe is me” if you feel hard done by and sing “Halleluiahrific” in delight, thanking above that it was good news this time? The latter is where most people sit and I guess a natural response based on majority view.   

But you see if there was only one response to situations and circumstance whether it be adverse or upbeat, how much better off would we be? Well, our heads wouldn’t drop, we would see the learnings easier, we would see a way forward albeit a new way and unplanned. We would find a happy silver lining feeling that otherwise would be obscured and continue with a positive mindset. After all, what is done is done and in this moment we’re in the here and now. We find a way to move on or we suffer in victim mode and lose all momentum in our goals, challenges and mindset.  

This happened to me recently when I hurt my knee and I had to stop walking, doing exercise, playing golf etc. My means of helping my mental health by keeping energized, motivated and stress free, I thought was taken away from me. I got angry and strapped up my knee determined to keep going but I made it worse and with that potentially a longer lay off. I was falling into victim mode and needed to look at this as just something that happened, it is as it is, I can make it good or bad, it's up to me. So, I made it good and asked what can I do that will help me now that I have this extra time? Well for one I can talk to more potential clients, so I did and I started to feel much better because I was receiving more feelings you get when you help someone. It lifted me, I could see a new path forward and ways I could keep an even keel until my leg healed as well as think about exercise that worked with my injury.  

Building and practicing a mindset to look at all circumstances in a positive way is no easy task and I don’t take this flippantly. I don’t for one minute think we can have a flatline response to all situations off the bat and perhaps it is a lifelong pursuit. There are people out there who found themselves in very trying situations that brought them to their knees questioning their very existence but somehow saw the situation from another perspective and moved on positively. So, I’m thinking my sore knee is a drop in the ocean to other sufferers and falling into negative victim thinking about this, is as they say, weak soup.   

The easiest way to start pulling yourself back from the brink and into a flatline response is to first show yourself some compassion. For example, you could say, “It's not my fault my leg is sore, these things happen. I will be up and running before I know it. How can I see the positives from this? What can I do to continue on the path I want in the meantime?”. I know it's not easy to think this way slap bang in the middle of a setback but when something does come up in your life try to find a minute to stop and be compassionate. It will spark a positive step forward and remember it's probably happening for a reason and if you don’t pay careful attention, you will miss why. Give it a try and you might surprise yourself.  

Yours in life,